I would argue that selfishness is more essential than caring whilst giving a massage treatment.
In the early days of my massage career, I cared so much about my clients, I cared about them far more than I cared for myself. It was common for me to give out advice that I was not following myself. It was normal for me to forego lunch, bathroom breaks, drinking enough water, just so that I could fit more client’s in because they needed me! Saying no, was not an option. I wanted to help everyone, but I never helped myself.
Not surprisingly, this was a recipe for burn out and in the brief lead up to burnout, my treatment quality would decline, which would just make me work harder to be better and ignore my needs even more.
I hardly need to say, that this was not remotely sustainable and was a very bad way to run a business and show that I cared for my clients!
The sad truth is, that most therapists go through this, and a huge percentage of those that do, will not return to their chosen career after their first burnout.
The average lifespan for a massage therapist in the UK is around 5 years, mostly due to the physical demands of the job and burnout. So, putting all your energy into caring for your clients, and neglecting your own needs, is severely shortening your career. Which in turn means that you are not physically able to continue caring for your clients.
Putting your client’s needs before your own, is actually doing all of your clients and potential clients, a disservice.
We very often hear the phrase, self-care isn’t selfish, and yet we need that reminder. Many of us find it very difficult to acknowledge this fact, so I say, embrace it and be selfish. If you feel that it is selfish to say no to your client wanting to book a massage in after you have already done 7 hours of massage that day, then be selfish and say no. Realistically we are fully aware that it is not an act of selfishness to say no, it is health boundary setting.